Thursday, 30 April 2009

Facebook Pedantry

I just caught up on FaceCrack (it is not me who is so anal as to time my useage, but rather the director of my company - more on him at a later date...). I spent most of the time inwardly whimpering/screaming at people on there. It is a shame it's so addictive; I am sure I would be a much calmer person if I didn't use it.

Here's my key issue with FaceCrack: spelling. Here's another: grammar. Oh, and one more: punctuation.

I have to sit on my hands (meterphorically, of course) whilst looking at Facebook so I don't spend my hour going around correcting people's mistakes. I am aware people might think, "She needs to get out more." But I think, "Why are you openly advertising that you're a moron?" when I see errors on Facebook. We're all friends on Facebook, aren't we? Does grammar matter? Well yeah, I am your friend, but I am sitting here thinking, "You've gone down in my estimations now I know you can't spell 'definitely'."

Here are some great examples on my news feed:

IDIOT1 reckons nobody does exporting quite like the Columbians. Her new motto is, "if in doubt, go Columbian..."
She almost certainly doesn't mean people from the capital city of South Carolina. And probably not graduates of the prestigious New York university either. And anyway, what exactly could she want to import from Colombia?

wher u find me up in n7 cuz, wit da best highgrade da best lemon cuz, price on da rise so da stress levels up, if u aint talkin money get steppin youngaz.
Sorry, what? I know you from school. A fee-paying, cricket-playing, scholarships-to-Eton-pushing prep school at that.

is learning alot through his dreams lately.
'A lot' is two freakin' words.

is T-1day till Mauritius!
My anger also extends to smug idiots.

Jesus wept.

loves carrot sticks and houmus. :-).
But not such a fan of spelling, apparently.

There are many, many things that irritate me about Facebook. Mostly because it makes everyone misguidedly think they're interesting or funny and it seems to bring out the show offs in people. And the idiocy.

Not at all like blogging then...


  1. Facebook and Twitter are vanity publishing for the whatever-we-call-this-decade. Once upon a time you had to keep a diary in the vain hope that one day you would have enough money to publish it and that everyone would then recognise you for the interesting, intelligent person that you really are. Now social networking offers you this opportunity on a daily basis, for free, with the added extra of being able to delete anyone who gets in your way.

    I know this because I unashamedly take advantage of it every day.

    Feel free to red pen me, my SPAG is apalling :)

  2. Even though I have a FB account, I call it "FaceAche" as I'm wondering why I bother with it... yet have not deleted my account - just "friends" who were not friends to start with.

    Slowly being sucked into Twitter though...

    Great blog btw :)

  3. Hi Zoe,

    I loved your rant.

    The words "a lot" spelled "alot" is also one of my pet peeves. My nine year old son even knows "a lot" is not one word.

    Brian in Texas

  4. Oh my God, I HATE it when people write 'alot'. And when they spell it 'definately'. Oh, and while we're here, 'rediculous'! I mean, how hard is it?!